Can I ramble......?
Since my graduation of high school, back in 2009 (homeschool that is), and much has happened. Indeed there's been-
happiness, sorrows, excitements, disappointment, plans made, plans smashed, anticipation, confusion, pursuits, let downs, heartaches, rejections, failures, joys, struggles, success, trips taken, places seen, people met, conversations had (that will be remembered), friends made, friends lost, much learned, much remembered, celebrations, parties, and much more.
This has been, I daresay, my journey thus far, and the sovereign Lord has with me in it and through it every breath and moment of it all. Teaching, rebuking & disciplining, humbling, strengthening, convicting, pruning, reminding, and leading me in it all.
Ha! I'm reminded now of a line of a verse of a song..."Oh Father, use my ransomed life if any way You choose". This is a very difficult prayer to pray, but one that's worth it, when the person who prays it knows that "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain." -Phil 1:21; that have Christ is to have EVERYTHING, even if you were to lose it all.
Yea, there's I'm thankful and blessed, with all the Lord has blessed me with , yet I have desire, good ones at that. Oh, and I want to be completely honest here too. I want to be married, I want to have a family, I want to do gospel ministry among Somalis in the Horn of Africa, and other desires as well. Now these are all good desires, and I trust that the Lord in His sovereign timing, good & perfect will, will give me these things......or maybe He won't. Ha! "Our God is in the heavens; he does all that he pleases." Psshhh! No matter how much I may want those good gifts, things, or whatever, I know that the Lord will be pleased in giving or not giving them to me. As a Christian, I am like the man who found the treasure hidden in the field, and in his joy sold all tha he had to buy that field (Matt 13:44). I'm also like Paul; I count all things as rubbish & filth in comparison to knowing Christ & having gained Him! For God, by His grace, gave me eyes to see, behold, & savor His glory as revealed in His Gospel and as revealed in the face of His Son!
So to the grave as to whether I get married or not, whether I have a a family one day or not, whether I get to be a missionary among the Somali people in Somalia or not! Do I still desire these things? Ha! I'm not gonna lie; of course I do! Yet may such desire be dwarfed by the much GREATER desire for more the glory of Christ & His Gospel in my heart and life!
I ask this one thing Lord
To bask & exult in Your glory & greatness
To feast upon the glories of Christ
Take me deeper into the glories of Your Gospel!
In Your Son's lovely name,